foetid air and gritty - about

One-hundred and one things about Mikey.

I work for a Faceless Corporation^TM.

I support the Eastwood Rugby Union club.

I can't take rugby league seriously.

I'm a media snob, steering clear of commercial broadcasters and News Limited publications.

I suffer from empathy pains, which is why I can't watch some brands of comedy - mainly the ones where someone is humiliated, embarassed or trapped in awkward situations.

I believe that those who feel that they deserve better than public provision should pay for private services out of their own pockets.

I love the works of Max Dupain and Harold Cazneaux.

On an average day, I'll use all three modes of government public transport at least once.

I hate whingeing motorists.

I also dislike whingeing commuters.

I ashamedly enjoy S Club 7.

I get drunk way too quickly.

I am an only child.

But I have a half sister.

My first memory of a same sex attraction was in year 3 to my then best friend.

My last 'crush' on a girl was c.2002.

I'm incredibly self concious.

For a long time, I thought "munchy munchy moo cow" was a lyric from a Peter Combe song.

I often suffer from anxiety.

I believe society suffers from an overinflated sense of personal entitlement.

I often find myself fancying my male friends, but when it happens it's like being hit by a truck - sudden and shortlived.

My handwriting is horrendous.

I wear a shoelace wrapped around my right wrist.

I have myopia.

My bank account currently contains $4.36.

I have a thing for skaterboys.

And surfies.

Well not really, just lads who dress like them.

I own a skateboard.

I can't skate.

I have a rainbow flag on my Quiksilver backpack.

I believe in education for education's sake.

I don't really like the vocationalisation of school education.

I'm atheistic.

That is, if you don't count Flying Spaghetti Monsterism, in which case I'm a Pastafarian.

I don't like beer all that much, but I enjoy it.

I really like Vodka & Red Bull.

I bootleg Hill$ong CDs so that my nan gets her Christian rock and Hill$ong doesn't get royalties.

I cook.

I don't clean.

I identify as left-wing.

I wish Julia Gillard MP (Lalor, ALP Vic) was Prime Minister.

Protocol and procedure interest me.

I'm into requiem pieces, especially Fauré's Requiem.

I like bagpipes and pipebands.

I have a thing for marching bands too.

I want to join the Army Reserve.

I originally wanted to join the Navy Reserve, but they do bugger all.

I've been aboard the HMA Ships Parramatta (FFH154), Anzac (FFH150), Melbourne (FFG05), HMNZS Te Kaha (F77), and ex-HMA Ships Vampire and Onlsow.

I prefer cut cocks.

Death doesn't scare me.

But the manner of my death does.

Despite my pacifist ideals, I really like shooting people [with paintballs].

I procrastinate too much.

I'm mystified by people who dislike tomatoes or seafood.

I never grew out of the Thomas the Tank Engine phase.

I suffer periodic floods and droughts of boys - either a bunch at once or none at all.

I spend impulsively.

I used to be terrified of St Mary's Catheral because of the crypt.

I was baptised in Sydney's St Mary's Cathedral.

I introduce myself to new boys with a name that is not Michael, nor a variation on that name.

When drunk, I often hit on straight lads.

I love fresh oysters, with a squeeze of lemon.

The world of physics amazes me.

I came out to my mother at an Ikea store.

My favourite artery clogger is the Bacon Deluxe at Hungry Jacks/Burger King.

I haven't been able to hold a relationship for more than two and a half months.

In high school, I dated a girl four times, and for a week each.

Smells are very emotive for me.

I'm still waiting to cash in my fifteen minutes of fame.

I want a government job.

I don't like the politicisation of the public service.

My place of sanctuary and refuge is Manly Beach, and I often collect my thoughts on the ferry trip en route.

I don't have any photographs of myself.

I'm a little claustraphobic.

I sometimes laugh uncontrollably at things that I initially didn't find funny.

I can't tell jokes well.

My favourite part of the body is the little depression at the bottom of the neck between the collar bones.

I detest bogan mothers who constantly shout at their kids and demand that they be still and quiet at all times.

I have participated in covert political stencilling and stickering.

I lack tact.

I have little patience for people who should know better.

My favourite utensil is the splayd.

I love The Rainbow Connection, by Kermit the Frog.

I have a thing for World War Two era music.

I never learnt long division.

My best root was in a car at the drive-in movies during a thunder storm.

I don't deal with the death of others very well.

My mum often uses me for cheap labour around the house, for such things as retiling the roof or servicing the lawn mower.

I pulled my bicycle apart with a few to overhauling and rebuilding it.

My bike is still in pieces in the garage.

I carry a small periodic table in my wallet.

I once sent a girl the Queen of Hearts from a deck of cards.

I've promised a female friend of mine my sperm if she is still childless by the time she is forty.

I have a right-shoe/left-shoe footwear purchase policy with my mother.

My favourite TV program is Mediawatch on the ABC.

Peter Jackson Super Mild is my lung cancer of choice.

I want to sex Drew Mitchell (Rugby Union, Wallaby fullback).

My pornstar name is Joe Belmont.

I'm allergic to pool chlorine.

My favourite author is Nick Earls.

Signed, sealed, delivered, he's yours!